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Review
by Kozo: |
Midway through The Gigolo 2, former King of Gigolos Fung (Dominic Ho) tells high-class prostitute-in-training Monica (Connie Man), “Sometimes dirty things are best.” Well, not this time, and the reason may be that this thing isn’t dirty enough. The sequel to last year’s Category III howler opens with Fung having split from his director girlfriend Chloe, who went to Hollywood and hooked up with someone else. She left Fung a Lan Kwai Fong club called High X, where he provides services for the rich and affluent while cruising the scene like a jaded club warrior. His sideline? Love tutor. Fung is hired separately by two girls to teach them about the sexual arts. In the case of lawyer Isabel (full-lipped Leslie Lam), she’s getting married but is a few degrees Celsius below frigid. She wants to enjoy sex with her future husband so she hires Fung to teach her to love – but not actually have sex with her. Naturally, he turns her into jelly and soon she’s looking for some real action from Fung.
However, the main story has to do with Fung’s other client Monica (Connie Man). A film and TV extra, Monica is pressured by free-spirited pal Sushi (Iris Chung) to take money for her body – a reality for some girls in the entertainment industry and really the only option for Monica, since her mother has severe and expensive medical problems. While Fung only had to teach Isabel how to enjoy sex, he has to school Monica in the ways of pleasuring others. Cue training montage featuring a cigar and a couple of walnuts, which Monica has a hard time taking in her mouth without coughing because, “It’s dirty.” That’s when Fung, doing his best Henry Higgins impression, tells his Eliza Doolittle that dirty things are best, which eventually frees Monica’s mind to become a rabid and in-demand sex worker. Soon she’s earning money hand over fist (no pun intended), but as these stories go, her loins really quiver for her teacher. So Funica or Mong is going to be a thing soon. Aaaand that’s the story. Hey, where’s the conflict in this thing?
Gigolo 2 does come up with a more tense storyline, involving S&M villains Big Dog (Tony Ho) and Mona (Winnie Leung), but it just pops up at the end to bring this Category III wannabe to a close. I say “wannabe” because Gigolo 2 is decidedly less risqué than its already not-that-risqué predecessor, with plenty of sideboob and some exposed rear but none of the “points” that raise collective audience blood pressure. Also, direction is rather lifeless. Sex scenes and dialogue scenes are shot with the same level of seeming disinterest, and performances leave a lot to be desired. Connie Man improves slightly after she gets her sexual schooling, but she’s mostly glaringly bad, and Leslie Lam is handily upstaged by her pouty features. On the positive side, Iris Chung shows some personality, while Alex Lam (Remember when he was the annoying little kid in Stephen Chow movies?) steals his scenes by showing off his freakishly buff bod. Dominic Ho gets an extra boost thanks to his poorly-performing co-stars and also his magnificently wispy facial hair, which probably steals a few scenes of its own.
The best parts of Gigolo 2 are undoubtedly the cutaways. Since this film won’t grind or thrust that hard, it relies upon cutaways to waves crashing, rockets launching, fireworks exploding or lava bursting to sell its orgasmic feels. Of course, the effect is hilarious rather than arousing, which would be great if the film were more self-aware. But it isn’t, meaning long stretches of tedium enlivened by boring sex scenes with totally awesome cutaways to lava bubbling ferociously. If that’s your recipe for a good Category III movie, you can have at Gigolo 2. Otherwise, this is a disappointing sequel and makes a Gigolo 3 (which probably won’t happen anyway, if the story isn’t retconned) an unwelcome prospect. Other notes: Gigolo 2 steals a scene wholesale from the 27-year-old romcom When Harry Met Sally, and – to the uber-disappointment of many I’m sure – there is no prosthetic penis this time. While the first film spent so much time referring to – and occasionally peeking at – Fung’s massive member, this film just forgets about it completely. If that doesn’t tell you how little fun Gigolo 2 is, I don’t know what does. (Kozo, 3/2016) |
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