January 9th, 2011
Delusions of Grandeur — Seven Films to Save Hong Kong Cinema
While prepping some blog posts about a gaggle of promising Hong Kong films scheduled to be released in 2011, I remembered a piece I once wrote for the very first installment of my old “A Man Called Sanjuro” column for LoveHKFilm.com.
Way, way, way back in 2003 — perhaps in anticipation of what I presumed would be the long, slow death of Hong Kong cinema as we know it — I published a list of Hong Kong movies that I arrogantly believed would “save” the nation’s film industry in one fell swoop. Really, all I did was propose a list of movies that I would make if I had the power, connections, and/or talent to do so.
Interestingly enough, at least one of them is coming to pass — my proposed Monkey King movie — albeit not in any way influenced by me and to be shot in 3-D with a different cast and crew. As far as the other films on my list, I don’t think anything remotely resembling what I proposed is any closer to getting made.
Still, I personally think What Now? would be a great, if challenging concept for a romantic comedy in any country, as I think the genre is incredibly stale and almost offensive to watch in its contemporary iteration (Damn you, Katherine Heigl!). Also, a film in the vein (get it! Vein!) of The East Runs Red could be fun, especially in the wake of the vampire craze kicked off by Twilight and The Vampire Diaries. Some might say this movie has already been made, but I’m not sure that Vampire Warriors is exactly what I had in mind. Oh, and the less said about The Trouble with Twins the better.
As far as LoveHKFilm.com The Movie is concerned, it’s especially amusing to look at the main characters of this proposed in-joke of a film. Aside from Kozo and myself, you’ll probably be left wondering “Who the heck are these people? And what happened to them?” Honestly, I’d like to know myself.
Anyway, looking back, I think I would recast myself slightly younger and thus closer to my own age. Hmmm….
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LoveHKFilm.com: The Movie 2011
Director: Dennis S.Y. Law, Roy Chow Hin-Yeung
Writer: Christine To Chi-Long
Producer: Wong Jing
Cast:
Ekin Cheng, Aaron Kwok, Daniel Wu, Shawn Yue, Donnie Yen, Guey Lun-Mei, Lee Na-Young, Elanne Kong, Fan Bing-Bing, Chapman To, Simon Yam, Wu Jing.
Preview:
Webmaster Kozo (Ekin Cheng taking over for a departing Takeshi Kaneshiro) is getting married and his long-time nemesis Egg Shen Chang (a returning Aaron Kwok) will stop at nothing to spoil the wedding. It’s up to his old pals Calvin (Daniel Wu replacing Leon Lai/Owen Wilson), Kevin (Shawn Yue), and Sanney (Donnie Yen) to put the kibosh on Egg Shen’s nefarious machinations.
Time travel may or may not be involved, and Raymond Wong Bak-Ming appears for no apparent reason. Thanks to uncredited reshoots by Herman Yau, this might actually be watchable. To be released the twelfth of never.
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Okay, enough of that tomfoolery; you can read my old list here, but please stay tuned for some info on upcoming Hong Kong releases. I’d be the first to admit that they are a lot more promising than any of my suggestions!
January 9th, 2011 at 11:53 am
I formally request that I be played by DONNNNIIIEEE, or the guy who played Mr. Twister.
January 9th, 2011 at 12:00 pm
The only way I’m allowing the KEG to use my name in LoveHKFilm.com: The Movie is if my character is played by Edison Chen. Gots to keep it real yo.
January 9th, 2011 at 12:05 pm
I would DEFINITELY see LOVEHKFILM: THE MOVIE, and would eagerly look forward to dvd extras!! do i get a ticket to the premiere?
January 9th, 2011 at 12:28 pm
@TheGoldenRock & Sanney — Okay, we’ll recast the picture. Shawn Yue is fired. Both DONNNNIIIEEE and Mr. Twister will play the role of a Man Called Kevin, reflecting the duality of the man’s cultural ties, while Edison Chen will be stepping into the role of Sanney — although I’m concerned that a pivotal scene in which Edison is using his Mac to update his blog will garner more than a few titters from the audience.
@CeeFu — Oh yeah. You will be the first to receive a ticket and are entitled to the Blu-Ray/DVD/Digital Copy Extended Edition as soon as it comes out!