This movie has a bizarre and strangely affecting ending that's cheesy, deliriously romantic, and so over the top that it charms rather than alienates. It’s too bad that the ninety minutes preceding are god-awful, wasting actors like Rosamund Kwan and Andy Lau in this wacky Hong Kong romance that steals from (of all things) the Steve Martin-Goldie Hawn classic Housesitter.

For plot’s sake: Rosamund Kwan is Lam, in love with eternal boyfriend Michael Tao, but she has this stupid problem: she reacts violently to men touching her. She and Mike go splitsville as a result, and she gets drunk and finds herself in the sack with Andy Lau, in his most pathetic performance yet. Anyway, Andy ends up living in her house and fools her parents into thinking he’s her husband (ala Housesitter). Hijinks ensue. Really, this movie is just unbearable. Giving twelve pints of blood in one sitting may be preferable. (Kozo 1996)