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Whatever You Want
Chinese: 珠光寶氣 "I tell you, it was this long!"
Anita Yuen and Michael Wong
Year: 1994
Director: Wong Jing
Action: Bruce Law Lai-Yin
Cast: Anita Yuen Wing-Yee, Michael Wong Mun-Tak, Christy Chung Lai-Tai, Jordan Chan Siu-Chun,Sheila Chan Suk-Lan, Wu Fung, Mimi Chu Mi-Mi, Sin Lap-Man, Wong Yat-Fei, Law Kar-Ying (cameo)
The Skinny: Wacky movie-parody fest from Wong Jing that's actually pretty funny. It's also pointless and chock-full of false, cloying moments.
 
Review
by Kozo:

Cheap quickie from the master of cheap quickies, Wong Jing. Anita Yuen stars as Ping, an average Hong Kong girl who loves movies so much that she watches them incessantly. She even watched eight one evening all via fast-forward. How? They were all directed by Wong Jing.

Though Ping is unpopular, she does have fine lineage. Her father (Wu Fung) has many wives, and one of them gave birth to beautiful, popular Pearl (Christy Chung). Ping idolizes her half-sister, and is delighted to be working for her at an ad agency, despite being paired with porn-loving scumbag Yam Kim-Fai (Jordan Chan).

While looking for props for a commercial, Ping finds three pearls which, when rubbed, produce Bo, a damn good-looking genie (Michael Wong) who proffers three wishes. In typical Anita Yuen fashion, she makes Bo go for Pearl. Things get worse when Ping starts to fall for Bo (and vice-versa, which is always the case with movies like this). However, Pearl isn't about to let Bo go without a fight.

Trying to watch this as an actual film is impossible. This is commercially produced cinema designed for mass consumption. The jokes, gags, and joys of the movie are all based on identification with the various stars and the roles they play. Wong Jing references himself numerous times, and even decides to roast other directors. In a famous parody of Wong Kar-Wai, Ping idolizes pompous director called Wong Jing Wai, who makes mind-numbing cinema that angers audiences. While attending one of his films with Bo (a sickeningly funny parody of Ashes of Time), she even runs into her idol, who has to escape from the theater patrons because they want to beat him up.

That isn't the end to the movie references. We also get references to Shanghai Beach, Chungking Express and Speed. The finale of the movie takes place on a bus that's stuck at 50 mph, where Bo must choose between Ping and Pearl. But do we really care? I don't think so. Finding any of this truly compelling is near impossible. All we can do is sit back and take in the wall-to-wall movie parodies with some sort of amusement.

To be honest about this mindless piece of fluff, it's actually not that bad. Sure, any romance and drama feels cheap and pointless, but the movie does create laughs. The parodies are great, and Anita Yuen and Jordan Chan are fine comedians. So, it can be said that Wong Jing has succeeded at making mindless fluff that actually amuses part of the time. It's still not a great movie, though. (Kozo 1995/2001)

 
Availability: DVD (Hong Kong)
Region 3 NTSC
Intercontinental Video, Ltd.
16x9 Anamorphic Widescreen
Cantonese and Mandarin Language Tracks
Dolby Digital Mono
Removable English and Chinese Subtitles

image courtesy of Mei Ah Laser Disc Co., Ltd.

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